It seems as if this school is operating on a faith in such a higher context of my own. SAGU feels as if the divine revelation of God will strike in the perfect timings, and we have no need for man-made warnings or devices such as fire alarms.
We like to use whistles.
I became aware of this one early, early, morning as I was suddenly jolted out of my REM cycle.
"Kelani, the RA just blew the whistle. We're having a fire drill. Get out of the shower. Should I wake Caitlin up, too?" my fine roommate says loudly in the front room.
Apparently, our RA had come to the fronts of our doors and blown a whistle as loudly as she could. This was to warn us that there was a fire and we should get out.
A fire drill? I groggily sat up in bed. Well, I never heard the alarm. I never heard the whistle.=
It takes all of Kendrick over three minutes to get out of the "burning" building. So we have to do the fire drill again on another night.
So here I am, standing out under the FLC overhanging in my pjs, wild hair while boys are mingling around me. (Why are we coed again?) And I realize one thing. The alarm never went off. And I never heard the whistle.
Okay, so let's say a fire hits Kendrick. Within three minutes the entire building will be aflame. Thats 180 seconds, if you didn't know. So within 180 seconds, our RA is expected to blow the whistle loud enough for all of us apartment-style-dorm-roommers to hear it and rush immediately to our safe place.
Sounds totally safe.HA!
This happens for a second time and all of old Kendrick makes it out within four minutes. Head Security guy says, "That was great for not having fire alarms and only using whistles."
I throw my hand into the air, as I have a burning question I just needed to get out. "Why doesn't old Kendrick have fire alarms?" I asked loudly.
"That is a good question," Head Security Guy answered.
I do believe even God was silent as the rest of us stood around waiting for the answer. Imagine crickets chirping right about now.
"Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't realize that's your answer. Okay then."
That's right ladies and gentlemen. Why don't we have fire alarms? That's a good question.
"Good job guys," I went on, with everyone looking on amused, "we only half burned tonight. Make sure you continue to tune into those whistles every other night while you're sleeping." Okay, so this last bit of sarcasm wasn't necessary. But, hey, I was woken up for the second time by a whistle and not a fire alarm.
I suppose that the divine revelation of God will speak to our RA's in our time of need. As in, perhaps they will wake up in the middle of the night to hear a deep voice, coming from perhaps the burning bush, telling them to take off their shoes for it is holy ground and to blow their whistles because we're all about to die.
Now, don't get me wrong. God's great and all. But I just don't see anything of that sort happening. I can't imagine the RA's just knowing that there is a fire.
Let's say this whole situation does happen. By this time, it's now into a minute and a half and both stairwells are burning. I hear the whistle. What do I do? Rush out of my door and jump off the balcony and hope that I only break one of my legs. Because let's face it, I'd rather break my leg than burn in my sleep.
No, here is what will happen. I will pray every night before I go to sleep that God will not send a fire our way and if He does, to let my mommy and daddy know how much I love them. Because, I'm a goner.
So, farewell family. I hope the burning flames don't take me in my sleep.
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